1. I started with exploring what Alienation might feel like.
It can mean many things so i went with taking my mother as an example. I went with the feelings of isolation, loneliness, and depression.
To connect it with my major I wanted to make some storyboard. this one is non-linear. meaning there is no timeline or sequence of happenings.
2.
3. I thought of other ways alienation can be interpreted within myself. How I go through constant metamorphoses. changing, gaining new perspectives. How far I am now from the person I was just two years ago. It can be an alienating feeling. What an ambiguous word.
I visualized it with a classic animation exercise from the Animators Survival Kit.; the bouncing ball.
Transforming trough symbolic deaths and rebirths.
Group proces:
I am such a motherly figure in this group and in any for that matter, checking in with everybody nurturing and leading the group looking at ones flaws and strong suits, hoping to give space to ones abilities instead of posing something on someone. Pushing who needs pushing and giving space to what needs space.
Personal proces.
I realized I have strong associations. A skill very useful in making films, from telling the story to shooting footage to editing. Through exploring this topic of alienation with illustrations, film footage from my phone, and storyboards, I was connecting and creating from a very intuitive level/mindspace.
I realized my association is equal or derives from my intuition.
Intuition, something I havent always prioritized within my creative proces, I might have even overruled it with my reason, my mind, that is critical, perfectionist and listening to my doubts as if it is as strong as reason.
From now on I want to listen to my associations, my gut and to my intuition, as a rule to following my creativity.
Exited to follow through with this method when I will make my filmplan during the next RALS minor period.
End reflection
2. From there my brain associated other alienating moments my mother might have experienced.
The association:
Mom - alienation - her experience with post natal psychosis
In psychology, having a psychosis is something considered extremely alienation both from yourself and from the persons surrounding. What you see and who you are is no longer seen trustworthy/
Laura